This article expresses the views of its author(s), separate from those of this publication. Readers are encouraged to comment or submit a Letter to the Editor to share their opinions. To submit a Letter to the Editor, follow the instructions here.

There are a slew of traditional Thanksgiving dishes that fill up the typical American’s dinner plate every November. However, aside from satisfying tradition, have all of these dishes truly earned their place on the table?

From turkey to stuffing to seven forms of casseroles, there are some Thanksgiving staples that I believe should be retired. 

To pay homage to football, another American Thanksgiving tradition, I will be ranking several traditional Thanksgiving dishes as “starters” or “benchwarmers,” with a few different terms for the outliers. 

Starters

Ham: First on the starters’ list is a good ham. The true Thanksgiving cream of the crop is a well-glazed ham, specifically Honey Baked Ham (not sponsored). I dream of the crispy, brown sugar crust that adorns a moist Thanksgiving ham, and being able to eat pieces of it like little chips. Not only is it a more flavorful main course option, but the leftover sandwiches you can make with it are immaculate. 

Mashed potatoes: Mashed potatoes are definitely a starter in the Thanksgiving staples list. Potatoes in almost any form are a comfort food that bring warmth and fullness in the best way possible. However, mashed potatoes specifically are a great pairing that compliments the entire Thanksgiving plate, both in texture and taste. Specifically, red mashed potatoes with a little bit of skin in the mix, a heart attack-inducing amount of butter and some pepper: chef’s kiss. Need I say more?

Stuffing/Dressing: While I know there is a difference between stuffing and dressing, I have always found the terms to be used interchangeably. In addition, the difference has less to do with the contents and more to do with the way it is prepared. Stuffing is another savory sidekick that uplifts the other components of a Thanksgiving plate. This is an underdog dish that screams Thanksgiving. With its herby flavor profile and filling nature, this is a staple that deserves to remain on the table. Regardless of the term, this dish is a starter for me. 

Macaroni and Cheese: Unless struggling with lactose intolerance is a major part of your life, macaroni and cheese is always a starter in my lineup. There are so many possibilities when it comes to preparing this dish, from the type of pasta to the type of cheese and a potentially crispy topping, this cheesy pasta favorite is a staple comfort food and completes the savory triad.

Benchwarmers

Turkey: Coming in hot with the mother of all Thanksgiving, turkey is a benchwarmer. While you may find me sporting a headband inspired by the feathery bird this Thanksgiving, turkey is often overdone. Regardless of how it is cooked, there is a certain standard that turkey peaks at. There is nothing worse than eating a dry piece of turkey when you have been preparing your Thanksgiving tastebuds for 12 months. Turkey, I know you have been the M.V.P. of Thanksgiving since the 1800s, but it may be time to go into retirement.

Cranberry Sauce: I don’t want to make any assumptions, but cranberry sauce may be one of the most obvious benchwarmers on this list. There is no need for the reddish-pink, gelatinous substance that escapes from the OceanSpray tin can every year like a cranberry Flubber. It’s hard for me to discern whether my aversion to cranberry sauce is rooted in the way it maintains the shape of the can or how it tastes like a fall candle. Regardless, cranberry sauce is non-essential to making a good Thanksgiving meal and will not be making an appearance on my Thanksgiving table this year. 

Corn: What isn’t the cream of the crop on the Thanksgiving table is corn. This starchy vegetable is firmly a benchwarmer. While there is nothing inherently wrong with corn, compared to its more exciting Thanksgiving counterparts, it’s too simple. Similarly to how turkey has a peak, the flavor of corn can only go so far when making it in a Thanksgiving style. Not to mention that creamed corn is not even an option I would consider.

Casseroles (sweet potato, green bean, broccoli, cornbread): The group of dishes that fall into the casserole category have been deemed “special teams.” This is because, while they are a Thanksgiving stereotype, their true potential can be overlooked. However, to make a controversial claim, these all go on my starting list. It may be a result of my southern roots, but I thoroughly enjoy casseroles as a whole. It not only comes down to the taste, but there is again something comforting about the plethora of ingredients that get thrown into one pan and then baked all together. Once cooked, what was once a few ingredients has become a dish that serves the many. 

While there are many Thanksgiving staples that I didn’t list, there are endless possibilities when it comes to creating a delicious Thanksgiving menu. From main dishes to sides to desserts, this holiday brings out some of the best food Americans have to offer, but also some of the most disturbing. 

Regardless of whether you agree with me or found my opinions totally off-base, I hope your Thanksgiving table is filled with good food and warmth. Eat well and stay full, Ospreys!

___

For more information or news tips, or if you see an error in this story or have any compliments or concerns, contact editor@unfspinnaker.com.